Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Revenge, served cold.

Last weekend, Aaron was switching from night shift to day shift. As he was trying to realign his internal clock he found himself full of energy at 3AM. What to do with all that energy? Apparently the answer is clean the kitchen. Unload the dishwasher, reload dishwasher, move stuff around, BE REALLY LOUD AND ANNOY YOUR VERY PREGNANT WIFE. His intentions were good, but once you wake the beast it tends to stay woken. Infuriated at having my sleep interrupted by a full grown human who should know better, I consoled myself coming up with a list of things I could do to get back at him without crossing the line. All mildly annoying, none of which are actually illegal. Pick and choose at your discretion and enjoy heartily.

1. Replace coffee with decaf.
2. Mix salt with coffee grounds.
3. Remove shoelaces from one of each pair of shoes
4. Reprogram cell phone directory so that 5 numbers are off by one digit
5. Reprogram stereo settings to least favorite music stations
6. Switch all video games into wrong boxes (this works with CDs, too)
7. Sign up for all kinds of embarrassing mail in their name
8. Replace alcohol with similar looking juice

And there were others, but it was a few days ago and my memory is fuzzy. Please note that I haven't actually DONE any of these, but coming up with them was a great tonic.


Anonymous said...

I don't even have the balls to switch the coffee to decaf. He would be like lion shot with a traq dart. Unpredictable and Snappy. I know, I have seen it.

Anonymous said...


PS. Forgot to sign. Miss you all.