Yesterday may possibly have to go down in the annals as a day not to be repeated.
Everything was fine up until 5:45pm.
Then the shit hit the fan.
Adrian and I are sitting at the dinner table and he's got ants in his pants and can't sit still. And to add to his antsy-pantsy dance, he decides to use his fork as a drum stick and the plates & table as his drum kit. Not acceptable. This is a standing house rule. I give him 3 warnings then take away the fork. Woe unto those who shall deprive him of his cutlery! 20 minutes of sobbing and hysteria over a stupid fork. We replaced the "big boy fork" with a baby fork and hustled his tushie to bed.
Then a few hours later, Jack decides that it is time to supplement his meals with a mouse. He brought said deceased rodent into my house and tried to eat it off the dining room floor. Mama don't play that.
For those of you who don't know Jack there are two important things to note: firstly, he is a cat. secondly, he never catches his own rodents. He finds ones that have been pre-caught. And in Jack's mind, rodents are without expiration date. There have been rodents that are so far past living that...lets just say that the circle of life can be really gross and wriggly.
Then (it gets better!) at 12:54 am the smoke alarm goes off! I groggily haul my butt out of bed and yank it down off the wall b/c it is not the regular beep-beep-beep of the smoke detectors of old, but more of a beep. beepity-beep. beep. And ours is a new fangled smoke/carbon monoxide doohickey. I'm trying to read the instructions on the back and it's happily chirruping away, and I read the line: if the red light is flashing, get out of the house & call the fire department. I flip the mamajamma over and sure enough the red light couldn't be happier about being a red light: look how i blink! So first I call the fire department, then I wake the weensy ones and haul them out to the car to wait for assistance. Poor Adrian is so confused and cold, i stick him in the car w/ the heat running & a blanket--Fiona is all snuggly in her bunting and could care less. The paramedics arrive, check the house for CO and declare it safe to reenter. Turns out I should probably just change the batteries. And if I hadn't been woken from a dead slumber I probably would've figured that out on my own.
So now I feel like a giant ass for having called the firefighters, and woken the babies, and I was hoping for one of those undo-buttons to miraculously appear in front of me, but no such luck.
And where was Aaron for all of this?
He misses all the fun.